Aiding in the Fight with Depression

0

We’ve all seen the internet memes about how to help someone with depression. I’m taking this opportunity to turn those memes into a totally useful list of ways to help your friend with depression.

Roll them into a burrito using a thick blanket.

People who are in a depression cycle enjoy being wrapped in warmth and tightness—something to make them feel as if they’re no longer falling apart at the seams. Rolling them into a burrito brings back comforting thoughts of infancy and being swaddled and comforted.

Leave a gift basket of chocolate cupcakes with thick creamy frosting, a couple of bottles of wine, and one large wineglass.

Because a sugar-induced high followed by a severe crash is in no way harmful to an individual suffering from depression, and we are all aware of the curative powers of wine and chocolate.

Build a blanket fort with them.

This is the same concept as the swaddle burrito—but less suffocating. Extra points for building a kid-free moat around the fort and stocking it with wine and chocolate. It’s the perfect dark and warm hideaway for depression sufferers.

Drag them outside.

Preferably when it’s sunny. Bribing with wine may work, but know that once the wine is depleted she may begin to wander back inside. Sunlight and its Vitamin D producing rays are a perfect pick me up.

If all else fails, douse with holy water and call the guys from Supernatural.

depression fighting depression Nashville Moms Blog

So, tongue in cheek solutions aside, depression is a serious mental illness. It is estimated by the World Health Organization that over 350 million people around the world suffer from depression and/or anxiety. At best, depression is a series of “down” days that take an emotional, physical, and mental toll on a person. At worst, depression can lead to institutionalization or suicide. Despite its seriousness, many either disregard friends and family who struggle with it—insisting they’re making it up—or make light of it. While many can relate to the ridiculous memes that circulate regarding depression, not many of them provide information on how to help someone struggling in realistic ways. While I have my days of wanting to do nothing but being wrapped in a cocoon of blankets, I also know I have a kindergartner and toddler who need my constant attention. And while chocolate cupcakes bring temporary highs, they can also bring sugar crashes that can enhance depressive symptoms.

Many are ashamed of their battles. They feel an overwhelming guilt that they can’t function like “normal” people. They’re bombarded with questions like, “But you were fine yesterday, what happened?” and “Well, why are you depressed?” These questions, while well intentioned, are not only unhelpful but incendiary to someone in a less than peachy mental fog. Truth is, we don’t know why this happens. We can’t pinpoint a reason we are depressed. We just are. It could be a million things. It could just be one. Asking why we are only adds to the guilt that we are not capable of controlling something that we feel we should be able to control.

Here are a few truly helpful ways to help someone with their struggle or doing their low periods.

  • Offer to pick up their house. A person who struggles with depression loses interest in doing even the most mundane task. Getting out of bed takes most of the energy we have for the day—forget about cleaning dishes and folding laundry. Set a time to come over and help them fold laundry. Not only will the chores get done, but you’ll leave them feeling so much better thanks to some companionship.
  • Take the kids for a few hours. She may do nothing but sleep during that time, but sometimes that’s all it takes to perk the mood up enough to face the battles ahead. I often feel the guiltiest during my depressed lows because I know I can’t fully be there for my kids. It tears me apart, and that only makes the depression worse. Having someone to watch them for a couple of hours, play with them, and nourish them—when I desperately need to practice self care—is likely the most meaningful thing a person can do.
  • Be there for them. It may sound simple, but if we’re being honest? It’s not. People who suffer from depression are not the most social, affable, likeable people during their spirals. I have had friends abandon me completely during those moments simply because my mood swings were so bad. Sticking by someone, letting them know you’re there no matter what, and just listening to them—even if they’re complaining for the hundredth time that their husband didn’t take the trash out and it’s really upsetting them for some unknown reason (even though it shouldn’t). Just listen. Don’t offer advice. Don’t try to fix it. Just be there. Bring them a (singular) cupcake. Share a glass of wine. Be a friend. And know that this time won’t last. Within a week, they’ll be back to their normal, affable selves. Your relationship will be stronger for it.

Do you know someone who struggles with depression?
Do ::you:: struggle with depression? What things do you find help you?

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here