I’ve had a great life, and I have complete faith it will only continue to get better and better. That said, I am an only child—and that fact often makes me a little lonely—and a little sad. I write this post anonymously because I do not want my wonderful parents (or my friends who are parents of only children) to suffer any negative feelings as a result of reading this post. Everyone is different. I know many only children who love everything about being one. But alas, I do not.
For as long as I can remember, I have been mindful of the idea that there is a relationship in life on which I am completely missing out. I have amazing friends—and a terrific sister-in-law—but they aren’t siblings. There is not one other person on Earth who was made from the same genetic material I am. Sure, that makes me unique, but that also makes me lonely. There is no one else who grew up in the same household that I did, no one who can laugh over (or commiserate over) experiences with my parents, and there will be no one else who will know what it is like to watch my parents age—or help me care for them as they do.
Because of these feelings, I always knew that I would have more than one child. I ended up having three, and to be honest? I would have more if I could. When my children run in circles around the living room—laughing with gleeful abandon—they are filled with joy, simply from sharing that spontaneous experience with their siblings. I’ve never had that experience, and I never will.
God willing, one day my children will have children of their own. Their siblings will come to their hospital room and hold their brand new babies. My son or my daughters will look into the face of that sweet little bundle, and they will experience that special and unique aunt/uncle love that can only stem from that special and unique brother/sister love that they already share.
Please know that I’m not naïve. I know that not every sibling relationship is the wonderful and amazing one that I imagine in my daydreams. However, a lot of them are. Television shows like Parenthood, Six Feet Under, and countless others as well as any number of movies are rife with siblings and their bonds. You may not notice it—because odds are that you have a sibling and you are a part of that group. As an only child I will never be a part of that circle, so I will be the one over here sobbing over the Bravermans and the Fishers and just how lucky I think they are.
Now, pick up the phone and call your sibling!
I so get this. I was an only child then found out I had a half sister, got excited then disappointed when it just didn’t work for us to be friends/sisters.
Too much history in the way.
Your kiddos have a gift in each other. Be happy you gave it to them.